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Finding Balance

Not in the best of moods today. Except for the good news that Fang gave birth early this morning!! So excited for her! :)

Expanding Appetite Right now I need chocolate. I'm craving it so bad it's like as if I'm pregnant. Which I'm not. I just had lunch too by the way. The past two days I've noticed I have a huge appetite. And even after I had a meal, I can still feel hungry or feel like a gastric's coming. That isn't good news for someone who still has lots of kilos to lose.

Forgetting Things I wanted to bring my orange chocolate Marks & Spencer biscuits but I forgot. Just like how I forgot to throw out the rubbish bag from the toilet too. I wonder what's in my head. Yesterday I forgot to bring my pump's valve. Had to rush all the way home to get it. Urgh. 

Anyway. I'm still finding it hard to balance these days. Motherhood isn't easy.

Time for Learn and Play Yes I am still figuring out when to play and teach Junior. Weekdays seem to be out of the question cos once we reach home, Junior wants to sleep. We're left with weekends, which aren't fully ours to utilise anyway :( I have to find ways to make car rides educational as well. Time is so so precious. He's learning a lot now. Very inquisitive too. I better channel that energy properly.

Balancing Needs of Two Babies Example, the Vietnam trip. One wants to go on holiday, and the other baby I'm afraid might get sick during or after the holiday. And I feel like I'm neglecting one baby :( Not spending as much time, not doing for him as much things as I did pre-pregnancy.

And sometimes I feel like I'm neglecting myself too. I think I need some me time. Or just to cry. I have this weird habit of needing to cry once in a few months. Or a few weeks. Depends. Most of the time I wake up feeling much better, but that depends as well. I'm not depressed, am I?

Argh damnit lah. All this negativity seems to be affecting my milk production. I have to think happy thoughts!
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